As I stand at the threshold of a significant medical journey – an open heart surgery to repair a thoracic aortic aneurysm– I am enveloped in a myriad of emotions. It’s a path laden with uncertainty, fear, and profound introspection. This moment takes me back 30 years, to a time that forever altered my core beliefs and understanding of life, marking the birth of my son and the harrowing days that followed. In those anxiety-ridden days, my son was air lifted from Albany NY to Pittsburgh Children’s Hospital when he was two days old. The fragility of life was starkly laid before us, my long-held beliefs were profoundly shaken and reshaped for the better. All in an instant.
In the throes of my son’s medical crisis, I found an unexpected strength, a bedrock of resolve that allowed me to be the pillar for my family. In that instant that reshaped my beliefs came a clear and profound knowing of the healing to come. A peculiar clarity emerged that helped support others; it’s as if the path of action and care becomes illuminated, guiding you to be the rock upon which others can lean.
Now, as I navigate my own health challenges, I find the roles reversed—the strength I once offered freely to my family is now being returned to me, infusing me with the courage and hope I once sought to impart. Back then, the prayers and well-wishes from family and distant friends became beacons of healing light converging upon Pittsburgh, each thought and prayer a luminous missile of hope targeting the darkness of my fears. They were a testament to the collective will for my son’s recovery, illuminating the path of action and care. Yet, now, as I face my own medical journey, I find myself on unfamiliar terrain. The role of caretaker has shifted, and I stand not as the provider of strength, but as one who seeks it. This role reversal is humbling, revealing a vulnerability that we all carry within us, no matter how strong we may appear on the outside.
The collective strength of those around me has become my fortress, my beacon. The outpouring of care, the skilled hands of surgeons, and the moral support that surrounds me are the pillars upon which my confidence is built. This interconnectedness, this shared strength, is my saving grace, just as it was thirty years ago. And so, I am learning the profound lesson that strength isn’t just about being able to bear the weight of the world on one’s shoulders; it’s also about the courage to let others help shoulder that weight with you. As I step through this new chapter, I am deeply thankful for the beautiful reciprocity of care and the shared journey of healing that binds us all. Together, we navigate the unpredictable seas of life, sometimes as captains and other times as passengers, but always as part of the same vessel — humanity.
I invite you to join me in this ‘Journey’, to share your own stories of challenge and transformation, as we together explore the profound impact of our experiences on our beliefs and lives.